The Battle

I never really understood how your heart and your mind can want to go in two different directions all at once until I had a child. This fight seems to be coming up often recently. Tyler has suffered from reflux since he was born and it is getting worse as he gets older. I know it will go away eventually, and of all problems to have it is a good one, but being thrown up on all day is no fun. The worst part is that it is affecting his sleep patterns. I have been rocking him to sleep for the most part since he was born, as I was told, "you can't spoil a newborn". But now that he is four months, the art of self-soothing needs to be learned. The problem is: how long do you let him cry it out???? For regular babies, those without reflux, the answer may be as long as it takes. The problem with reflux babies is that the longer he cries, the worst his reflux gets resulting in a choking, coughing, gaging baby who wakes up after 25 minutes of sleeping, and when I pick him up he burps and spits some of his last meal due to his fit before. And there is the battle. Do I keep rocking him to sooth him into a peaceful sleep and teach self-soothing methods after the reflux is over, or do I let him cry it out hoping that he will eventually self-sooth and sleep longer. How long can your heart handle listening to your crying baby? I never thought I was a softee, especially after teaching for four years, but having your own does change things. And so, the battle continues.....